But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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