We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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