I would go down on you faster than GM stock
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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