Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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