My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
