weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
