Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I need a burrito and a hug.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize