Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
only if we run a train.
done.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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