Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
