I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
