the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
you traded sex for a burrito?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
