Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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