Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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