Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize