DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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