R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
