You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
The feeling are messing with the penis
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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