He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
