Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
