all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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