ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
