her vagine was all disorganized.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
