Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
The best revenge is premature balding
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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