do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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