I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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