I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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