Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
