Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
This is classic penis vs brain.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
