I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize