I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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