it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize