If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
