u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
