yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
