So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
