So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize