If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
We don't watch enough power rangers
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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