she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
