Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Randomize
