so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
