It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
