The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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