drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
