lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
