It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
