i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
