Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
