No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
