ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
worst night to have a conscience
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
