He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
